God will use anyone, but that does not mean there are no qualifications.

1 Timothy 3:1-7 It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he desires to do. ² An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, ³ not addicted to wine or pugnacious, but gentle, peaceable, free from the love of money. ⁴ He must be one who manages his own household well, keeping his children under control with all dignity ⁵ (but if a man does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of the church of God?), ⁶ and not a new convert, so that he will not become conceited and fall into the condemnation incurred by the devil. ⁷ And he must have a good reputation with those outside the church, so that he will not fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.

Application: “The husband of one wife”, this is a term that has spurred many discussions over the centuries. I will not attempt to claim that I have the full understanding of it’s meaning, and again Lord, as I approach your Word Lord help us to be sure that first and foremost we endeavor to be a people of integrity, so that we will not mislead or misrepresent Your truth. God’s word tells us So it's important to look at what possible meanings this could have, yielding to this truth – which is what really matters most - is our conviction based on Your Word and a clear conscience? We do not need to run around and make sure that every elder in the body of Christ agrees with our conviction on this issue. We need to have a standard for our own position as an elder and for the elders who serve and lead in our local Body. In the original this term actually states: “a one woman man”. Below are some thoughts of interpretation.

 

{a} Marriage to the Church (celibacy)- there are some who hold this position, but there is clearly no command for celibacy for elders in the Scriptures. If a man desires to live single that is a conviction he holds to God alone, and I support that, but it cannot be demanded for all men. 1 Cor 6:12, 7:1-3,9; 7:20,26; Matt. 19:10-12

 

 {b} Polygamy - this issue is in light of the culture at the time, sadly though, even today, men were taking more than one wife at a time. Though there is some interpretation that Paul meant an elder should only have one wife at a time, which means he can be married to 7 different women as long as he was only married to one of them at a time, never together.  However, this would be inconsistent with all that Jesus and Paul taught about marriage. Christianity came forth from Judaism, both embrace the teaching of the Old and New Testament which would give one man for one woman in marriage or “devoted solely to his one wife” 1Tim 3:12

 

{c} No remarriage - some even hold a strict “one-woman man” means even no remarriage. However, Scripture would make it clear that if the remarriage were based on the fact that the first spouse died this is not an issue. The man has a right to remarry after his wife as died. Rom 7:1-3 1 Cor. 7:39

{d} No singles - some also exclude singles from eldership because if you're single you are a  NO-woman man. Of course this would, again, not make sense in light of who God was using to write this epistle. Paul was single and even wished others would remain as he is, yet made it clear, it is a gift from God, to those that will be used in the Kingdom, God has planned. Paul shares this with the Corinthian church.

1 Corinthians 7:7-8  I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. 8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.

1 Corinthians 7:32-34  I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs-- how he can please the Lord. 33  But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world-- how he can please his wife-- 34  and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world-- how she can please her husband.

What does it mean to be a “one-woman man”? The explanations we've looked at so far are lacking and fall short of what the context of this passage demands. It is important to take the time to evaluate and understand the requirements that God is placing on those that desire a position as “Overseer”. It also causes us to pause and rethink our understanding of God's desire for marriage. Remember, all of this is given to us by God, emphasizing the importance for high standards for those who want to be the leaders of His church and those serving as leaders, in spite of how popular or gifted they may be?

Meditation Questions: When you face a scripture that teaches something you may not like – how do you deal with it? Do you believe that even though forgiveness is always offered, are there things in our life that can cost us opportunities? Why did not God state everything just black and white? When we deal with scriptures that leave questions, what should we do? What should we not do? What does it mean to you to agree to disagree?